Ur had picked a fight with three older boys, fully aware of the consequences.
Naturally, he lost the fight. The elder had to intervene before Ur got seriously hurt. The boys who took Ur and Akane’s food were now in the confessional, reflecting on their actions.
But the fight hadn’t been one-sided.
“And you hit them with a rock?”
“Yes.”
The boys who had attacked Ur were also injured. All three had head wounds, bleeding from being hit with a stone. The elder was speaking to Ur directly because this was a far more serious issue.
“If you were hungry, you could have told me. Even this poor orphanage could spare enough food for two children.”
Ur shook his head.
“That’s not it.”
“Then what is it?”
“I’m not hungry. I gave Akane the lily fruit.”
The elder noticed Akane holding a lily fruit from the backyard. The children were warned not to pick them, but she must have done it secretly.
“I’ll reprimand you about the lily fruit later. But if you weren’t hungry, there was no need for a reckless fight.”
“There was.”
“And what was that?”
“They bullied Akane. They are my enemies. I had to defeat them.”
Ur’s expression remained emotionless, but his eyes burned with a fierce anger. It was a scorching rage, deep within the young boy.
The elder sighed as he witnessed this.
“…This must be due to the hardships of your wandering life.”
He placed a bony hand on Ur’s head and, for once, spoke gently.
“That fury, if not controlled, will destroy you.”
“Fury?”
Ur repeated the elder’s words, not fully understanding.
“In your youth, you’ve already given up on expecting anyone else to solve your problems.”
That’s why he immediately acted against the children who attacked him and his sister. He tried to eliminate the “enemies” who threatened them, certain that no one would help.
He didn’t know how to rely on others, which was a significant problem. However, considering his current situation, it wasn’t entirely misguided.
“…Even you will leave us again, right?”
“Yes.”
The elder agreed.
As orphans, the country would protect them until they were adults. It wasn’t cruel enough to throw defenseless children out. However, because Ur’s father was still alive, he and Akane didn’t have the right to stay in the country. Unless their father started paying for their stay, they would eventually have to leave.
Soon, Ur and Akane would leave the elder’s care and the city. The elder could not protect them forever, and Ur understood this.
Thus, the elder couldn’t completely deny Ur’s perspective. Doing so would strip away the tools Ur needed to face future challenges.
“Your attitude is too rough and extreme.”
But just being harsh wasn’t enough. Survival required more than just ferocity.
“Extreme?”
“That extremeness might protect you, but it won’t help your sister.”
“Brother, aren’t you hungry?”
Akane was trying to give the lily fruit back to Ur, wanting him to eat. She was a kind-hearted girl.
Could she keep up with Ur’s way of living? The elder doubted it. Akane had gained kindness from Ur’s love but lacked his severity.
“She won’t be able to keep up with you. She’ll get hurt because of you.”
Ur patted Akane’s head, looking troubled.
“…I don’t want that.”
“I know.”
The elder nodded and knelt to meet Ur’s gaze. He saw the fire in Ur’s eyes.
“I will teach you virtue.”
“The spirits’ stories?”
“No, something more fundamental. The way to live in human society.”
To Ur, the world’s order and social norms were distant concepts. He hadn’t had the time to learn them. So, the elder would teach him.
“Respect the good and despise the bad. Normally, one develops this naturally, but you haven’t had the chance. So, I will give it to you.”
Without a moral compass, Ur would eventually falter, just like his father.
What the elder would teach might seem fragile and unreliable, but it was necessary to face challenges without resorting to violence.
“But, but…”
“Never forget your ‘self.'”
“Self?”
“You’ve learned that no one else will help you, and that only you can protect those you care about. This understanding is sadly true. The virtues I will teach you are just tools to uphold your ‘self.'”
The fierce ‘self.’
The strong belief that only you can save yourself. The elder wouldn’t take that away because it was essential for Ur’s situation.
“Forge your path through the wilderness with your self, and find your way with virtue.”
With those words, the elder patted Ur’s head, wishing him well.
Ur listened without changing his expression, but those words took root within him. They became a solid foundation that supported Ur through his harsh life ahead.
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And Now, in the Present
“Don’t mess with me.”
Ur’s core beliefs and his burning self surged from within. He could never forgive the pitiful saint before him.
“Are you angry, Ur sama?”
Shizuku looked puzzled, not understanding why Ur was so upset.
“Yes, I’m angry. Very angry.”
“What can I do to make amends? I’ll do anything.”
“Stop belittling yourself.”
Ur dismissed Shizuku’s attempt to placate him.
In truth, Ur wasn’t angry. It was his indecision that forced her into making a choice. He even felt guilty about it.
But now it was different.
Now, he was filled with rage. Her reckless actions no longer mattered to him.
“Why is Ur sama angry?”
Shizuku looked at Ur with a puzzled expression, as expected.
She had no idea why Ur was so worked up over something as trivial as herself.
“I’m not a close relative of Lady Akane like you are, Ur-sama. We’re not family. We’ve only been fighting together for just under a month. There’s no reason for Ur-sama to be so concerned about me.”
Shizuku’s observation wasn’t wrong at all. Indeed, as she said, Ur and Shizuku were practically strangers. They had spent an incredibly short time together as a group. There had been no events strong enough to forge a strong bond between Ur and Shizuku.
Yet, Ur’s reasons for being openly angry with Shizuku remained unclear. That observation did have some truth to it. Ur himself didn’t understand why he was so filled with passion.
Was it because her body was alluring? Right now, he had no desire to embrace her.
Was it because her heart was beautiful? He had never seen such a twisted heart.
Were they close friends? It hadn’t even been a month. He didn’t know her well.
Then, were they comrades who entrusted their lives to each other? …Ah, that was closer to the answer. But still, not quite.
Self-reflection swirled within him, seeking an answer. Ur let out a deep sigh and suppressed the anger swirling within him, turning inward to listen.
“The wilderness is opened by my hand, and the path is gained through virtue.”
The words of the old man who taught him how to live echoed in his mind.
“Draw out your own voice from the depths of your soul.”
The words of his current guide and mentor resonated in his head. And at the end of it all—
“…Ah, I see.”
And then, Ur understood himself.
“Ur-sama?”
“You said I must fulfill my duty.”
Ur sat in his chair and met Shizuku’s gaze. Her clothes were disheveled, her hair unkempt, unnecessarily provocative, yet Ur no longer averted his eyes from her.
“If I were to tell you to stop fulfilling your duty for the sake of redemption, would you?”
“…I cannot. I apologize.”
Shizuku shook her head sadly and apologetically.
“I will dedicate everything else to you. But duty must be fulfilled. Please forgive me.”
She bowed her head as if prostrating herself.
Duty, the one thing she could not compromise. Next most important was someone other than herself, and she alone was utterly indifferent.
“I understand a little better now.”
Ur nodded in agreement, firmly grasping her hand.
“So, dedicate everything else to me. You belong to me.”
At those words, Shizuku, who had been confused until then, smiled as if relieved. It seemed like she finally understood, flashing a relieved smile.
“Yes, of course.”
“And since you belong to me, you will cherish what is mine, won’t you?”
But her smile quickly faded. She tried to pull away in confusion, but Uru didn’t let go. He held her hand tightly, almost painfully.
“You’re going to devote everything to me and serve me, right?”
“──Why, why go this far?”
“Because I don’t like it, that’s why.”
It was all about ego.
Just like with Akane. No matter how important Akane was, it was Ur who chose to live as an adventurer and tried to act recklessly, ignoring his sister’s concerns.
Akane had nothing to do with Ur trying to save her.
Akane couldn’t live freely. Akane’s life was in danger. All those impulses, simply because he didn’t like them, drove Ur to this point.
Therefore, it was the same with Shizuku.
“You’re my comrade. I can’t stand you neglecting yourself.”
“Even if it’s my own will?”
“Your will doesn’t matter. I don’t like it, so this is how it is.”
Ur found a truth. No, it had been there from the beginning. It was his core, shaped by his foster parent, the gentle yet strict old man who taught him how to live in the human world, even unconsciously sealing something.
“I will save you, even if you don’t want me to. Selfishly.
“I want so I am.”
If he made one mistake, Ur might have turned into the worst villain. Ur found an inner flame that could have turned into the worst of all the villains. The way to use that power, he decided. To Shizuku, who was puzzled, he smiled strongly.
“Don’t make a troubled face. Nothing is going to change. I’ll follow your plan.”
“It’s about—”
“Let’s win together. We’ll break the gem golem.”
When Ur said that, Shizuku closed her eyes. After struggling and hesitating, she approached Ur and kissed him.
It wasn’t to cover Ur’s words or to charm him.
It was to seal a pact with Ur. She hugged Ur and laughed. It wasn’t a flattering smile. It was a small smile that seemed to shatter with just a touch, like the hollow eyes of a girl Ur had seen.
“I belong to you. Please, as you wish.”
“I’ll let you do that. A lifeless woman.”
So, at the end of twists and turns, the two made a pact.
The boy grabbed the hand of the girl who was trying to push him down to the bottom of the abyss, and the two jumped down to the bottom of the abyss together.
Thus, from now on, the two will see hell.
But it was a hell made by their own will.
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