4
My territory, the Margraviate of Lohengrin, is already quite remote, but the “Valley of Maids” Kanade spoke of was on another level entirely.
For hundreds of kilometers in every direction, there wasn’t a single human settlement.
“Why would you train maids in such a backwater…?”
“Maids are shadows. Unknown, unknowable. That is the homeland of maids.”
“But last time, you told me about it pretty casually…?”
“Because you are the Master. It’s no issue.”
Our traveling party consisted of five: me, Suzuha, Yuzuriha-san, Kanade, and Unyuko .
Suzuha and Yuzuriha-san were fine, but bringing Kanade the maid and a child like Unyuko was pushing it under normal circumstances.
Well, if there’s a whole training facility for maids here, it should be fine.
At first, we followed the main road, but soon veered off, cutting through forests and scaling mountains to take the shortest route.
That said, it felt more like a picnic halfway through.
“──Well then, Big Brother, what’s today’s challenge?”
“Hmm…”
To pass the time, we held one “contest” per day during the trip.
I’d decide the theme, and the winner could make one request of anyone. The results?
When Suzuha won, I had to give her a “Special Massage: Full-Course Edition” after dinner.
When Yuzuriha-san won, she made me carry her on my shoulders all day the next day.
And when Kanade won, I was subjected to a “Tyrant Lord Roleplay (Attempted)” with her as the maid.
Technically, they could’ve asked anyone, but for some reason, all requests landed on me.
“How about hunting today?”
“Hunting?”
“We’ll find game for dinner, and the one who bags it wins. Sound good?”
“Very well, Big Brother. My arms are itching for it.”
“Fufufu. It seems my time has come to prove my mastery not only of the sword but also the bow!”
“…A battle I cannot lose. To dance like a butterfly, sting like a bee—that is the essence of a maid.”
“Unyuu!”
We scaled the rugged mountains, and by midday, we spotted promising prey.
“How about that one?”
“Is that… a dragon?”
“No, Suzuha-kun, that’s a wyvern.”
Wyverns are like smaller, weaker knockoffs of dragons—but still tricky to take down.
This one was soaring leisurely in the distant sky,
possibly en route to terrorize some village.
“Lucky us. Wyvern meat’s delicious.”
“Indeed, Big Brother’s cooking will be something to look forward to.”
“Wait, you two. A wyvern could wipe out entire small nations without a skilled knight order…? …Ah, whatever.”
Even Yuzuriha-san, who seemed unconvinced, joined in as we prepped our long-range attacks.
“Nn… Hyah!”
With an adorable battle cry, Suzuha lifted a boulder (estimated weight: 5 tons) and readied to throw it.
“My turn. You’re too soft, Suzuha-kun—you should’ve picked something more aerodynamic.”
Yuzuriha-san uprooted a 20-meter-tall tree and assumed a javelin-throwing stance.
“Unyuu!?”
…Kanade, meanwhile, was using Unyuko perched on her head as a targeting device. I had to stop that one.
“Kanade, you can’t throw Unyuko.”
“Unyuko is tough. Survives any throw. Also, maids train by tossing each other into the Thousand-Fathom Valley.”
“No, no matter how tough she is, that’s a no-go!?”
While I scolded Kanade, Suzuha’s boulder and Yuzuriha-san’s tree… hit the wyvern but failed to bring it down. Not enough firepower, it seemed.
Oh well.
“Guess I’ll handle it.”
I pulled a coin from my pocket, took aim, and flicked it.
BOOM! With an explosive sound, the coin shot forth at blinding speed—and a moment later, the wyvern’s skull was punctured clean through.
Feeling smug as the responsible big brother, I offered advice:
“Suzuha, lighter projectiles gain more speed and power. Like this.”
“…Um, Big Brother? That’s not the issue here. The wyvern’s head just exploded.”
“Wyverns are weak in the head.”
“No, no, no! That’s not the point! How does flicking a coin instakill a wyvern!?”
“Technique.”
If I could do it, Yuzuriha-san—a top-tier knight—could surely master it with practice.
At my words, Yuzuriha-san sighed deeply, muttering:
“…Sigh. I thought I’d grown used to your unconscious overpoweredness, but I guess I’m still green…”
What did that mean? A mystery unsolved.
＊
After enjoying the wyvern feast, it was time to sleep.
“By the way, Big Brother, what’ll you do with your winner’s request?”
“Huh…?”
Oh right. I hadn’t thought about it.
Glancing around, I noticed Yuzuriha-san and Kanade pretending not to eavesdrop while Suzuha asked with fake nonchalance.
Did they expect me to make some outrageous demand? A little hurtful.
“I can’t think of anything, so maybe nothing—”
“No, Big Brother. That won’t do.”
Suzuha leaned in, eyes gleaming.
“The winner must exercise their rights. So think harder. There must be something.”
“Uhh…?”
“Honestly, Big Brother. Fine, I’ll give examples. Like, ‘I want to pamper my adorable little sister with endless head pats!’ or ‘I must know my growing sister’s latest measurements—!’”
“HOLD IT RIGHT THERE!?”
READ THE ORIGINAL TRANSLATION AT LOCALIZERMEERKAT.PAGES.DEV
Yuzuriha-san, who’d been facing away, sprinted over at breakneck speed.
“Th-that’s cheating! If you get to say that, then I want to train all night with Suzuha-kun’s Big Brother in a grapple! I want to drink his delicious miso soup every day! I want to protect his back forever—!”
“Those are just your desires. Denied.”
“Suzuha-kun, yours were your desires too!”
As the two erupted into chaos, I shrugged helplessly.
Meanwhile, Kanade silently approached.
“Kanade’s so well-behaved and quiet, huh?”
“Nn. Maid is quiet. Thus, demands reward.”
“Huh?”
“──I want to remain the master’s maid. Forever.”
“Then I’ll use my request too: ‘I want to remain Kanade’s master forever.’”
“…Nn.”
Kanade nodded faintly, leaned against me, and soon dozed off with tiny snores.
Suzuha, Yuzuriha-san, take notes.
5
After crossing countless mountains, we finally reached the Valley of Maids.
“So… this is it?”
“Yes.”
It looked like a quaint village nestled between cliffs—
nothing like a maid training facility.
“Let’s keep going.”
As we entered, several maids materialized without a sound.
Their age and attire matched Kanade’s—maids in every sense.
Their flawless footwork (zero noise even on gravel) betrayed elite training.
Even Yuzuriha-san, accustomed to high-class maids, gaped.
“Huh? …WHAAAAAT!?”
“Wow, everyone’s so skilled.”
“No, no, no! Silent steps are maid basics, but this is gravel! How can they walk on it without making a sound!?”
“Because they’re maids?”
“MAIDS!? NOT ASSASSINS!?”
So even Yuzuriha-san recognized their caliber. Fitting for Kanade’s homeland.
The maids watched us warily from a distance—until Kanade stepp
[Principal!]
“Nn… Good work, everyone.”
“WHAAAT!? KANADE’S THE principal!?”
“Yes. The Valley’s rule: its most skilled maid becomes principal. Thus, Kanade is principal.”
“Wow. Impressive, Kanade.”
“…Not really… mufufu…”
Kanade fought to hide her smug face, but her puffed cheeks and twitching nose betrayed her.
“Unyuu!”
Unyuko, perched on her head, sparkled with admiration. I totally get that feeling.
As Kanade’s master, my pride swelled.
Walking through the village, I noticed traps everywhere.
Pitfalls disguised as ordinary ground.
Cages rigged to drop from trees.
…Probably essential for maid training. Probably.
“Hmm…”
“Something wrong, Suzuha?”
“It’s just… this feels less like a maid academy and more like a bandit hideout? Hard to explain…”
“Ah, I get what Suzuha-kun means.”
“Yuzuriha-san?”
“To me, it’s more ninja-like. Like the legendary warriors from the distant eastern isles—”
“Huh, never heard of those.”
In other words, the Valley of Maids must have seemed, even to Yuzuriha-san, like the latest training facility for maids that also incorporated Eastern culture.
I was impressed—it was truly something remarkable.
＊
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